The Wedding Dreamer 1,2,3

Episode: 2
Author: Golpo_Buri_Tilottama

“I don’t know what kind of trial Allah has put us through,” I murmured to myself. “I’m terribly afraid of storms and rain!” So I quietly began reciting prayers in my heart.
Suddenly, something unexpected happened that startled both of us.

A huge tree fell right in front of us! It narrowly missed hitting us. By the infinite mercy of Allah, it fell on the shop’s tin roof instead. Otherwise, this day could’ve turned out very differently for us. To add to the fear, a loud thunderclap struck nearby. We both trembled from the sound. I didn’t know what fate Allah had written for us that day.

Sahil, seeing the situation, couldn’t control himself from fear. He came and hugged me tightly. He thought I was too scared. And for a brief moment, I found comfort in his arms, thinking it was a safe place.

But as soon as the fear wore off, I pushed him away from me. Sahil looked at me with disbelief.

I looked down, angry at myself.
How could I? I, who had never even shaken hands with a boy, just embraced one? How did I allow myself to do that today? I felt so small in my own eyes.

In a world where even wearing perfume can make a woman guilty of fornication—what did I just do? I couldn’t think anymore.

Sahil came closer and gently touched my cheek and asked:

Sahil: What happened to you?

Me: Please, don’t touch me.

Sahil: Why are you acting like this suddenly?

Me: I’m fine.

Sahil: You’re too scared, aren’t you?

Me: Yes, I’m scared—scared of Allah’s punishment and Satan’s whispers. Because Allah has told us, Satan is our open enemy.

Sahil: Why can’t I touch you? What does this have to do with Satan?

Me: If you had understood that much, we wouldn’t be having this conversation today.

Sahil: So what are you trying to say? That touching you is a sin?

Me: Yes, of course, it’s a sin—not just to me, but to Allah as well.

Sahil: My friends are more casual with their girlfriends than I’ve ever been with you, and yet you’re talking like this? You’re going to be my wife, and even then, I can’t behave freely with you?

Me: You know very well who I am and what I believe. How many times do I have to tell you? I’m not your wife yet. I’m just your fiancée. A fiancée is not a wife. Only when we marry according to Islamic law, we become husband and wife. A few signatures on paper don’t make it a marriage in the eyes of Islam.

Sahil: So you don’t accept our marriage? What do you want? I’ve always prioritized you and your words, and now this?

His words struck me like lightning. It felt like there was more storm inside me than outside. Was I really failing to make him understand even after explaining everything?

Being alone together like this before marriage is a trap set by Satan.
It’s stated in hadith that when a non-mahram man and woman are alone, the third presence among them is Satan. And he doesn’t leave until they fall into sin.

And we were about to fall into that trap.

I was speechless. Tears kept falling from my eyes.

Sahil: You can’t stay silent today. I won’t leave without answers. How long do you expect me to keep going like this?

I could see anger on Sahil’s face. I think his ego was hurt today. That’s why he was speaking to me like that. I kept reciting La hawla wa la quwwata silently. We had both fallen badly into Satan’s trap. Even believers are deceived by Satan’s whispers. And we are just ordinary humans.

I decided that today, I would speak everything clearly to Sahil.

The storm had stopped, but the rain continued. Wiping my tears, I told him:

Me: I’ll answer all your questions today. Just listen to me one last time. After this, I won’t force you to listen to anything ever again.

Sahil: Alright. I want to know why you’re keeping distance from me.

Me: You said your friends behave casually with their girlfriends. I don’t even do that much with you. Want to know why? Because your friends don’t see their girlfriends as their wives. But you see me as your wife. So naturally, you’ll want to get closer. And the more you try to be close, the more we’ll ruin our purity. Because Satan will whisper: “You’ll soon be married anyway, so what’s wrong with being intimate?”

That’s why I avoid you. Because premarital relationships are haram.
If we couldn’t control ourselves even in this short time, what would happen in the future?

Sahil: Love is sacred! Then how can love be haram? Answer me!

Me: Love is sacred—when it’s between a husband and wife. That’s the only sacred form of love. Allah declared only a husband and wife as lawful partners for each other.

People who promote “love” between non-married men and women in the name of modernity are promoting evil. They’re misusing the name of love and enslaving themselves to Satan.

If romantic partners were lawful, then in the afterlife, instead of spouses, there would be lovers in paradise.

I’ve said a lot today. I don’t know if I’ve made myself clear.

Sahil stood frozen. He was thinking that I was overreacting for a simple matter. But I had no choice. I must be strict if I want to win over my desires. Day by day, I was growing emotionally weak for Sahil.

So I had to say these things with firm determination.

Me: One last thing—until we are married according to Islamic rules, I don’t want to meet you again.

It felt like I was putting a rock over my own chest. Because I could see that Sahil lacked the patience to wait. Which could lead both of us astray.

Sahil: If that’s your final word, then listen to mine. I’m taking two months from you. Within these two months, I’ll make you my wife in a lawful way. Then I’ll come stand in front of you. That’s my promise.

He put me into a CNG auto-rickshaw and left, murmuring in anger. His face was red with frustration and sadness. But I didn’t call him back.
I just prayed: Ya Allah, keep him safe and give him the understanding to see the truth.

That night, I couldn’t sleep. I kept wondering—why did this happen? What is happening in our society?

This is the result of our so-called modernity. Nowadays, boys and girls live together like husband and wife without marriage and call it “love.”
They fall into unlawful relationships and justify it with emotional reasons.

If it were truly love, it wouldn’t involve free sex. And people treat registration as if it makes marriage valid in religion. Many are falling into this trap and even bearing children—but only Allah knows their fate.

By Allah’s mercy, I became aware of this trap early. But I still couldn’t stop it.

I was never in favor of registered marriages, because that’s not an Islamic marriage—it’s just legal proof for the government. If I had said I only wanted to get married by reciting the kalima, everyone would’ve called me “marriage crazy.”

What a strange society—people gain legitimacy without marriage but are called crazy for wanting lawful marriage!

Age matters for marriage, but not for falling into haram relationships. These made-up rules are leading us straight to zina.

While Allah says, “Do not even go near zina.”

And yet today’s social norms push us toward it.
The previous generations were better off. My grandparents had no paperwork in their marriages—only trust and sincerity. They paid mahr and recited the kalima. That was a valid marriage.

Because without paying the mahr, a marriage isn’t valid. Forgiveness or postponement is a misguided practice.

Allah says: “Give women their mahr with a glad heart. But if they willingly forgo a portion of it, then consume it with ease.” (Surah An-Nisa: 4)

Many misinterpret this and take mahr for granted. But the verse clearly says to give it first.

Now, mahr has become a showpiece and competition.
The higher the mahr, the higher the bride’s demand.

But as the saying goes:
“The full payment is often fake, the partial cash is real gold.”

Some think a high mahr is marriage insurance. It makes divorce harder.
It’s all a joke to me. That’s why I protested during my own nikah.

My uncle said he wouldn’t agree to a mahr less than 10 lakh rupees.
I told my mother: Am I some sacrificial cow to be auctioned?
I don’t want to be a decorative item in someone’s home—I want to be a rightful wife.

I got scolded for that, and I couldn’t even insist on kalima marriage after that. Eventually, the mahr was set at 100,001 rupees.

I can’t think anymore. I feel like I’m going mad.
When will Allah relieve me from this worry?

Since that day, Sahil has never come to see me. He hasn’t called either. He only talks to my mom or Tushar occasionally.

I get news about him from Tushar. I heard Sahil hasn’t come home even once in these two months.

I prayed in my heart, Ya Allah, please wash away all this pain and confusion with the rainwater. I can’t bear this sorrow anymore, my Lord.

The rain has slowed down.
Today is Friday. The azan has been called. I offered my salah and recited dua and durood. Then I read Surah Kahf—because it is said that whoever recites Surah Kahf on Fridays will be protected from the trial of Dajjal.

Just as I finished, my mother came beside me and asked…

To be continued…
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